One of the lyrics in a song by Toby Mac is “speak love” the song encourages people to speak love in their everyday life. How do you speak love and in what language? This blog post was inspired by the book title “Five love languages” By Gary Chapman. How often do you wonder how much your spouse loves you? When I was dating my husband I didn’t understand why he didn’t tell me he loves me as much as I told him. Don’t get me wrong, I know he loves me by his actions I still wanted him to say it .People show love in different forms, just like we speak different languages the same applies to love. The book discusses five major languages. Quality time, physical touch, gifts, acts of service and words of affirmation.
After reading this book I was able to identify my love languages which are gift and words of affirmation, it now makes sense to me why I am very sentimental to gifts people give me. I still have the silk scarf my mom gave me on my seventeenth birthday. It is almost rare I would attend a party without getting a gift for the celebrant, the down side to this is that not everyone’s love language is receiving gift. Understanding people’s love language will help you with relating with them. Words of affirmation is my secondary love language. I take it personal when people don’t show appreciation for anything you do, even if it is just holding the door open.
My husband’s primary love language is quality time so it makes sense for him to ask me to chill with him when I get back home from work before I make dinner. He also makes time for our monthly date day and he wouldn't trade anything for the quality time (pun intended) he spends on Saturdays playing with our son. His secondary love language is act of service, so anytime I do anything around the house that he is supposed to do he is always so happy. In the process of writing this blog I asked my husband how he feels when I do things for him, he said " I really like it because that is one less thing I have to do". Over time my husband has learned my love language and vice versa, this has really helped with our relationship.
This is a book I will highly recommend for everyone, it will give you an insight on how to build better relationship with people.
What is your love language? Let me know in the comments
Xx,
Dami
PS: if you are the first to read this line, comment below and send me a DM on Instagram, and I will send you a copy of the book (US residents only)